This is a beautiful piece so far. I really hope you will be able to finish it one day. The artwork is great, the story sounds interesting... and it makes me smile... That's what the cartoon used to do. It did made you laugh, but most importantly... it made you smile.
If you'd ever publish this as a book, I'd may be willing to buy it... if I could afford it.
I would like to thank you to have written Rainbow Dash like still being playful but having knowledge in her own domain and not having contempt for the intellectual passion of Twilight.
The trope of the "friends hate to learn thing and make a joke of the bookish girl" is saddening. MLP was great to have subvert that (for example in the episode with daring-doo, where ALL the friends of Rainbow dash are laughing immediately when she says books are uncool). In a time where so many are anti-intellectual, it's very welcome.
Your style is something I think I like. Things I think you will like to note about what I notice about your style. Big eyes, just slightly bigger than in the show. Also I think you draw your ears a bit larger too but it fits with the large eyes in my opinion. Vary nice shading, seems natural and not lazy like you see in the show. Though I don't think the shows animators are lazy I think that it's just quicker to produce episodes when you don't have to do all that crazy shading. Thin outlines, I like that you give them those thin outlines, it makes the characters feel more sharp.
One thing though. Is that cloudsdale peaking out of the right side of te large panel?